Considering my "sunset" station in this journey of my life, my number one concern was that the dog could live longer than me and that was a horrible thought because I would not be able to insure that a loving and responsible home would be in her future. Financial issues were also a concern but certainly not at the top of my list.
So anyway, I didn't make any active plans to get another dog. I still had my precious Calico Tabby cat, Puff who grew up with my previous wonderful Yorkshire Terrier dog, Pixie. And the cat was fabulous comfort for me and provided lots of love for eighteen years.
Lily and Puff
And then, as life has a way of shaping our journeys, I started reading about Cavalier King Charles Spaniel dogs. The breed was new to me and I liked everything I read about them. But, they were expensive! So, I just filed my new information in the back of my mind and proceeded with my simple stable and quiet life.
But then, quite some time later I was at the grocery store one day and saw a darling little puppy in a lady's shopping cart. I couldn't believe my eyes. It was the first time I had seen one other than the many pictures I had looked at. The lady and I chatted and yes she confirmed that it was a Cavalier! And, her comments were glowing about her experience with the breed.
AND, I think it was in February 2006, that my girl friend (who passed away 2 years ago) and I were driving to Sacramento International Airport to pick up a baby girl puppy. On our way home, my girlfriend insisted on holding her. There was no way she was going to let her stay in the crate. The puppy snuggled in her neck and nibbled on her ear lobe. It was so exciting and she was so very tiny. Yes, she is the "jewel" in the middle of the next photo. The one with her little tail in the air! You can see she is the littlest in the photo. Just the right size!
My heart is so heavy as it is every single day. I miss her more than my words can say. For various reasons we had a certain bond that is indescribable. My grief/loss is as great as it was the day she left.
It was a few days ago that I just happened to see the poem written in 1922 by Rudyard Kipling (1865 - 1936). I would like to share it with you.
"The Power Of A Dog" by Rudyard Kipling
THERE is sorrow enough in the natural way
From men and women to fill our day;
And when we are certain of sorrow in store,
Why do we always arrange for more?
Brothers and Sisters, I bid you beware
Of giving your heart to a dog to tear.
Buy a pup and your money will buy
Love unflinching that cannot lie—
Perfect passion and worship fed
By a kick in the ribs or a pat on the head.
Nevertheless it is hardly fair
To risk your heart for a dog to tear.
When the fourteen years which Nature permits
Are closing in asthma, or tumor, or fits,
And the vet’s unspoken prescription runs
To lethal chambers or loaded guns,
Then you will find—it’s your own affair—
But … you’ve given your heart to a dog to tear.
When the body that lived at your single will,
With its whimper of welcome, is stilled (how still!).
When the spirit that answered your every mood
Is gone—wherever it goes—for good,
You will discover how much you care,
And will give your heart to a dog to tear.
We’ve sorrow enough in the natural way,
When it comes to burying Christian clay.
Our loves are not given, but only lent,
At compound interest of cent per cent.
Though it is not always the case, I believe,
That the longer we’ve kept ’em, the more do we grieve:
For, when debts are payable, right or wrong,
A short-time loan is as bad as a long—
So why in—Heaven (before we are there)
Should we give our hearts to a dog to tear?
The poem is "pretty heavy" but also some "food for thought".
But there is no way I would have wanted to do anything differently. I think the love
from our dogs/pets, even though it has a time limit, can help soothe the sorrows of
today just by us having had the love.
from our dogs/pets, even though it has a time limit, can help soothe the sorrows of
today just by us having had the love.
Please hug the ones you love and never forget your four legged "jewels".
Wishing you Well.
Mary
Lily looks so perfect. I know that sorrow you feel Mary. I sort of wish I did not love dogs so. The SPCA had many in cages at PetSmart this weekend and I could not look at them. Only donate. They are like family members to me; really my life revolves around them. I must have been a dog in a former life and I've stated many times that I want to go to dog heaven when I die. After owning dogs my entire life, Sister and Emmy, who are 11, will be my last. I just can't lose any more. Here is a poem I love by Edna St. Vincent Millay.
ReplyDelete"Parrots, tortoises and redwoods live a longer life than men do;
Men, a longer life than dogs do;
Dogs, a longer life than love does."
May your heart heal.
Hi Mary, thank you for your sweet visit. Our Dante is my sweet little boy. We have his mother as well, Chloe. They are so cute. A big part of our family. I am so sorry for your loss, It is difficult to lose a fur baby. We grieve and miss them so much.may your treasure her memories and heal in time. We are missing our other two fur babies, Sasha and Lacy who passed on to Rainbow Bridge. Thank you for sharing the sweet photos and poem. Hugs. P.S I live in the foothills too.
ReplyDeleteOhhhh, my heart still aches for your loss, Mary! It is never far from my thoughts how I will bear the passing of each of my fur babies, 2 of whom are getting up there in age at 11 and 12 years old! I'm so sorry for the continued loss and sadness you feel without your beautiful and beloved Lily by your side. Would you ever consider a small songbird such as a Canary, or another often singing bird called a Society Finch? I've never had a Canary, but I understand you only need one, and the males sing just beautiful! I do have Society Finches, and the singing from my males just warms my heart! And they are such a joy to watch throughout the day! I do love them for the cheer they bring me every day rain or shine!! Maybe somewhere on my blog you can hunt down a post or two where I've talked about them. We started off with a female and 2 males. On one occasion when she laid a few eggs, my daughter talked me into keeping them (incubation does not begin until about 1 week after they are laid, so previously I had been disposing of the eggs as soon as she had laid them), and 2 actually ended up hatching! What a beautiful and lovely experience that was, and I'm so glad we watched and participated in the amazing process of them growing. They both ended up being males, and the one is my most beautiful singer ever!!! They are not very expensive, but have given me a world of happiness in return. You can learn so much about the bird, their care and how to give them the best environment possible for a happy existence via the internet. They live to about 4 or 5 years old. I'd be happy to share more with you if ever you'd care to give your love to a pet bird!! I think that maybe being able to give your love to something would be so healing and helpful for you!!
ReplyDeleteP.S. Actually I think we started off with 2 males and 2 females, because I wanted them each to have a mate. They did each pair up, and it's so neat to watch how they bond, and groom each other, snuggle close, etc.
ReplyDelete