Tuesday, February 27, 2018

Sad News Is Especially Difficult

When it is about someone who is near and dear to you.  My dear New York friend who I talk with frequently by telephone has been challenged during recent years with many complications of living with Diabetes, specifically foot ulcers. Damage to the blood vessels can occur when there is prolonged periods of hyperglycemia (high blood sugar levels) and blood circulation can be cut off and body tissue dies.

It is so difficult to even write this  - - - She developed Gangrene and her Right Foot had to be Amputated !!!   

She is in the hospital for at least another week.  My heart is feeling so very traumatized.  I am just having a difficult time processing this.  Her husband who is battling Cancer is by her side as he always has been.

I have written about my friend in the past.  We have been friends since High School.  And, if you like, you can read more at the following blog posts - Love Sent My Way and A Very Generous Surprise
Let's PRAY for them.

Mary

Monday, February 26, 2018

The Snow Is Falling

And, has been for over an hour.  This first photo is through the window screen and it was about 10 minutes after it started.

It is getting heavier and heavier.  It may be the most I have seen in a few years.

I know the photo quality is pretty bad.  It snowed continually for over two hours and is beautiful.

I hope that all of you that have more snow than what you like are staying safe, warm and healthy.

Mary 

Saturday, February 24, 2018

Do You Like Brussels Sprouts

Does anyone know a fast way to prepare Brussels Sprouts?  It always takes me a long time to clean and trim them.
These Brussels Sprouts With White Beans and Pecorino Cheese are very good.

 I used Romano Cheese and it worked well and was good and creamy.
Sauteed mushrooms could easily be added for another layer of flavor. And, some Crispy Bacon Bits could be added for a little garnish.  And, who doesn't like a tad bit of bacon?
Have you tried any new recipes lately? If you are interested in this recipe, just leave me a note in comments.

It's nice to be back in the kitchen.  I also made some Hearty Chicken Chili  made with smokey fire-roasted tomatoes, black beans and spicy tomatoes and green chilies.  Tomorrow,  or in a day or so, I will tell you about it.

Just, a little FYI.  I am feeling GOOD physically and mentally.  Not great, but I'll take GOOD any day.  I feel very optimistic about the future.  I hope any of you dealing with tough challenges receive some relief and the rough edges are softened.

Mary

Friday, February 23, 2018

The Sun Is Bright And The Snow Is White

Can you believe it?   This morning my little home at 2000 feet elevation in Northern California is blanketed with a lace covering of Snow.  It is a novelty for us.  Yes, it has been colder than usual and snow was predicted.  Still, it is always a little exciting.
Bright-bright Sun.


And, a lacy covering of snow.
The Yellow Daffodils are on their way.

Who is Blue Ivy?  Maybe, next week, I can tell you more.  How is that for a hook?

It's the beginning of a new Weekend and the days are counting down closer to Spring.

Have a Good Weekend.

Mary

Tuesday, February 20, 2018

It's Really Nice

I can't begin to explain how much better I am feeling.  I am still the same age with all that goes with that fact.  But, I am still in amazement at how once the leg pain stopped, it really stopped.  And, I only need very little medication.  I am so very grateful!  And, the challenging aspects of life are a lot easier to roll with.  I am making progress in my "method thinking", my term for intentionally sweeping the non-essential (usually  hurtful) thoughts away from my presence.  My psyche is beginning to feel like a Butterfly that has found FREEDOM to fly to heights of happiness, love, forgiveness and acceptance never experienced before.  Baby Steps !
Just wanted to pop in and share with you how my moment is going.  And, thanks for all of the encouragement. There is so much more to life than where you are going to shop, what you have, where you vacation, who likes you and who does not.  Let Sunshine Shine.

Have a Wonderful Day.

Mary

Friday, February 16, 2018

Tidbits

Get Ready !
I doubt that I ever will know the answers to the many questions I have about my life and I think it is about time for me to open a new chapter and slam the door closed tightly to all the psychological pain and emotional trauma from my children and subsequent family throughout my lifetime.  By now, with the many years of working diligently with professional help to "fix myself"  it is very clear to me that I am doing nothing more than "chasing my own tail".  With history of horrible events like holding someone down on the floor with hands around their neck, throwing computers against the wall, punching holes in walls, "serving time" for physical abuse,  spreading hurtful untruths, temper tantrums, terminating promised college financial assistance during semester because someone is mad and never again help financially, lack of concern for others, no willingness to change any behavior, secrets and periodic total alienation - - - Why would I be part of this?   And, the most recent hurtful event took me totally "off guard".

THIS IS TOTALLY NUTS!    Why would anyone want to be a part of this circus ? ? ?     Especially, at my age.     Remember 1992 - - - Why can't we all just get along?
 Let's Get Happy !  It has been two weeks since my appointment with the Orthopedist.  After that time, I have all kinds of treatment opinions and for several days I pondered what my approach to the disabling pain would be.  With many options now available to me like many medications, acupuncture, extensive physical therapy to name a few, my approach is to start only one option at a time so I will know what my body is responding to.   Many hours have been spent in deep thought with focus on the interaction of mind, body and spirit in healing and staying healthy.  I eventually decided to start with narcotic pain medication.  Living alone presents an additional challenge with utilizing chemicals especially since I have a high sensitivity.  So, starting with very tiny portion of the medication and paying close attention to my bodies reaction I have been able to slowly determine what my body can safely utilize and receive some pain relief.  There has been only one time that I have been concerned about the medication and how I was feeling.  The best way I can explain it is that I felt "like I was losing myself".  It was frightening but that was only one time.

It is my intention to utilize every possible approach that may help me.   What I am about to say is something that I can hardly imagine. After having severe burning pain from left hip to ankle since the end of October, I have not had any leg pain for over a week.   Of course there are periods of intense buttock/low back pain but nothing like the horrible leg pain.   I really feel speechless.  My next activity is to schedule some physical therapy.  Prior to this, I did not know how I could manage to get to my appointments regularly. 

 BABY STEPS ! 

I try to constantly be aware in my brain of MIND-BODY-SPIRIT and the tentacles of available positive thoughts that go with each entity.  Obviously, there isn't much room (in my brain) for thoughts of life's displeasure when there is so much JOY that I can attribute to MIND-BODY-SPIRIT working together!

Given my personality, it is not easy for me to not question how all this is happening.  But, I must find strength to resist my exploring curiosity.

ONWARD AND FORWARD.

To be continued - Thank you.

Mary

Tuesday, February 13, 2018

Life In My Lane

After a couple overcast and somewhat rainy days we are having some very appreciated sunshine.  I do not know how my life can have so many roller coaster rides in so few days as it has recently.   In the interest of brevity I have only a few comments regarding the recent wedding activities.  They did not bring the joy to my heart as I had anticipated.  For me, it brought exclusion which was such a jolt to me. Only two times during the past six weeks have I spoken with my Granddaughter.  It seems that a check up phone call to me is not a priority in her life.   And, an email response from her yesterday shattered every window in my house - My Heart.  Enough of that stuff!  I know I am strong and this too shall pass.

I am happy to say that I am making some progress, slow as it may be, with using pain medication.  Unfortunely, I am very sensitive to narcotics. It is trial and error and I have to be careful not to overdose and use very small dosages by cutting the pills. I am determined to find the pain zone that is tolerable and gives me a better quality of life.  Pain does not define me!  I do not see surgical intervention in my future.  The surgery is just to frightening for me.   This is my recent MRI.


And, this is the recommended surgery.              NO THANK YOU.

I look forward to Spring Time and all the new life coming forth in the Garden.

This afternoon I plan to spend some time outside sitting in the sunshine and listening to the sounds of Nature.

Wishing you Happy Days.

Mary

Thursday, February 8, 2018

Mama Bride

 My Granddaughter and Great Granddaughter.

I ABSOLUTELY ADORE THESE PHOTOS ! !  I quickly viewed all the photos from the wedding via a link that was sent to the bride.  For some reason these brought a strong emotion of Beautiful Mama Love.   I will try to post more photos when I figure out how to do it easier than the way I did these.

Til next time.

Mary


Sunday, February 4, 2018

The Sun Is Shining Brightly

And, the weather outside is delicious around the high 60's.  More lovely is the fact that I feel less stressed than I have in a long time.  All major appointments are behind me and lots of the annoying tasks which come with having your own home are completed for the time being.

The gate at the front of my home may give me "a false sense of security",  but when it is not working which is very rarely I feel an undercurrent of slight unrest.  I usually can maintain it by myself but the time had come for me to call in "the big guns".  And, I did.  There was a significant part associated with the electrical circuit pad that needed to be replaced.  It had been seven years since I have had to get help.  The gate was very expensive but it also has been one of the most "bang for my buck" expenditures. It was installed 22 years ago and cost me very little for maintenance since that time .  When I had it installed way back then,  I know their were a few comments.  At that time there was very little fencing and gating in this area because it was a very quiet environment around here.  But, as the world has changed greatly, so has my neighborhood changed.  I took a couple photos to show how it goes across the corner of my lot.  The gate is very efficient and does not have to have space to swing horizontally,  but a vertical lift is perfect.  Oh, and it is solar and remote controlled.
About ten years ago, the property across the way was purchased and a very nice large house was built with high-end amenities including custom made gating . The residents are exceptionally nice, friendly and helpful.  I mention the house because you may notice the gate at the entrance to the road/ driveway.  After their gate was installed I telephoned them and  "Welcomed  them to our gated community".  They said thanks and we laughed ! !  Note.  We are the only gated residences in the neighborhood.
 Surprisingly,  my White Cyclamen plant at the front door is giving forth beautiful large blossoms.
And, my cherished Puppy and Kitty Sculpture by Isabel Bloom sits nearby.
On Friday, I headed out through the forest and across the river for my much anticipated medical appointment with the Orthopedist.  The appointment went very well. Much to my surprise the doctor remembered me from when I treated with him some ten years ago or so. After reviewing the MRI and other fairly recent medical reports he really did not have anything new that had not been discussed before. He was very kind, patient and gentle as he discussed surgical intervention with the caveat that he would not push surgery.  We discussed all the procedures that I have already completed during the years and the reality is that if the day comes when I can no longer walk a Spinal Fusion of my lumbar area will be necessary. And, that would include the placement of metal rods with screws. A bone graft would be taken from my hip to use with the fusion.  I say "Not yet!"

Prior to going to the appointment I spent some time thinking about what I would like to try if the Dr. did not have any new treatment modality that I am not aware of.   I requested a Physical Therapy program to improve my core stabilization exercise program, Aerobic reconditioning and work toward a home exercise program. This would give me more strength in my muscles.  In addition he gave me an order for acupuncture. I am certainly fine with trying acupuncture.

In addition, I have decided to start to take one of the narcotic medications cautiously and increase the dose in very small increments.  I have to be patient with the initial side effects.  It is not unusual for the side effects to lessen and go away eventually. 

I know a couple people who have had lumbar fusion and I think I will contact them and see if they will talk to me and answer some questions about their experience.  It is so nice to know that I have two doctors that both tell me to let them know if there is anything else I would like to try.

Wishing you a good week.

Mary

White Garden 2009

White Garden 2009
IN MY GARDEN there is a large place for sentiment. My garden of flowers is also my garden of thoughts and dreams. The Thoughts grow as freely as the flowers and the dreams are as beautiful. - Abram Urban

Iris Flowers 2009

Iris Flowers  2009
In the garden I tend to drop my thoughts here and there. To the flowers I whisper the secrets I keep and the hopes I breathe. I know they are there to eavesdrop for the angels. ~Dodinsky

Pink Flowers 2009

Pink Flowers  2009

Yellow Flowers 2009

Yellow Flowers  2009