Repotting

I have been out in the garden for the past three hours even though I am in a lot of pain . If I had not been wearing my back brace , I would not have been able to do the watering and numerous tasks like picking up the cardboard from my painting project, removing spent flowers from the garden plants, preparing to do a little patch work painting where I am returning one of the hose reals to a better location , just to name a few of the tasks . Oh, I worked some more on the raised garden bed. l have been doing it for short periods of time whenever I work in the garden working on more routine activities . Call me an inchworm or a tortoise (take your pick), but, I will get the job done little by little . My ice pack is in place ! 

The outdoor activity was a good alternative and diversion to watching the TV (which I turned on this morning) and being reminded of the horrendous state of affairs we the people of the nation find ourselves living ! Having lived as long as I have,  certainly takes me back  to many times ( the list is too long to itemize) the world has been in a frightening super charged state of affairs . There is no question in my mind that current progressive technology including social media has highly influenced the awareness level of each and every one of us that we may not have had in the past . Don't get me wrong . Advancing technology is great . But, what a shame that social issues have never had the level of attention , financial support and intellectual contribution from the many great minds . Let us optimistically look forward to a time when the people of the world will live in more peaceful times and not a world that is totally destroyed by Hatred.  Just my two cents worth ! Wow , I didn't plan on giving you any thoughts on that .

Speaking again about my gardening - - -

Wishing you a good day and one filled with optimism for better times .

Mary

The Squeaky Wheel Gets - - -

The Oil or sometimes gets Replaced !   Remember, we have become a "Throw Away Society". 😞

As I have persisted in my search to find some answers to some persistent  health issues I think I finally am getting what I would have expected from a Competent Medical System a couple years ago when I started this inquiry .  Today I received a comprehensive medical review from an Oncologist .  It was a different M.D. than who I expected to see .  This doctor is on a temporary assignment to assist staffing at our local hospital.  In my opinion, he is a very straight forward, very knowledgeable , well seasoned (age 67), Hematologist, Oncologist, Internal Medicine Physician from San Francisco/Berkeley area .  His reviews on the internet are quite a rigid dichotomy of "love" (5 score) or "hate" (1 score) and nothing in between .  The consultation dialog went smoothly and then he stated that he would be ordering a LOT OF TESTS !  And, that was music to my ears .  That is what I have wanted !!!   He ordered many lab tests, ultrasound of Abdomen and ultrasound of Liver as well as a PET scan . Oh, and also Colo-guard (you know - the TV commercial) .

All the recent doctors I have seen have asked more than once if I have been a problem alcohol drinker or hepatitis patient .  And, I am not!!!  It seems that the Liver is an organ of concern . And, the Enlarged Spleen is secondary to a diagnosis to be determined .  The doctor stated "We are looking for lymphoma" and I knew that.  There is that C-word again!  However , there is concern of a possible diagnosis of what is called Portal Hypertension which is also a serious issue .  There is so much more info, but this gives a little idea of what is going on .

The When I say many lab tests - - they took 14 vials of blood ! Yes, 14 Vials !!  Good thing I have nice veins !  The Phlebotomist was grateful .  When I returned home there already was a message from the Radiologist office.  Ultrasounds and the PET Scan are scheduled for next  week and the return MD appointment is two weeks from today for review of tests and discussion .

I am feeling very optimistic about my future . Having said that,  I am a realist and have had a lot of time to ponder what decision I would make if I was presented with life saving options .  And, my decision remains the same .  I am 80 years old without any family involvement and really no support system and I see no reason to consider chemotherapy and/or radiation therapy .  Why would I consider subjecting myself to such a catastrophic portentous experience ?  I have lived a long life and I have arrived at a place of feeling Daily Gratitude and Happiness and Living each day to the fullest . And, I plan to go out that way . God Willing .

Love One Another . Life Is Precious .  Until next time .

Mary

Beside Myself With Joy

It has been very interesting to process how wonderful my life has become !  My mind approach has changed so much in the past year and a half that I feel like a totally different person .  Living in the moment with thankfulness and openness to pleasurable new experiences, gifts (non-material) and mindful acceptance without expectation is so very different from how I have lived my long life .  I know that in the past the majority of my subconscious and conscience thoughts were focused on "survival" .  Sometimes, that meant fear and that manifested with physical and of course mental anguish ! And, I don't even think that I knew what it felt like "to relax"  -  I mean REALLY relax .  I feel a very overpowering sense of Wholeness, Comfort and Gratefulness .

May I share a very recent course of events that has truly overwhelmed me with initial response of marvel versus disbelief !  As you may recall, for about three years I have been very displeased with the lack of proper medical care .  And, recently I have started to formulate a plan to remedy the situation .  With the guidance of my Psychologist I was able to get scheduled to see a Nurse Practitioner who has had a very good reputation .  Of course there was a long waiting period . And, at my request I was given the name of a Psychiatrist who would be able to evaluate my antidepressant  medications with a focus of assisting me with the increased symptoms of Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD).  Even though we are having beautiful summer weather and no symptoms of SAD I would like to think that I will not have the increasing symptoms during the winters to come .

Now then.  When I contacted the Psychiatrist office (which is an hour and a half drive from here) I was told that he was no longer working at that office .

And  then.  I received a call from the office of the Nurse Practitioner office that she was going out on a medical leave for surgery and would not be able to see me .

If you recall, I mentioned that when I started this journey I was going to approach this with strong determination to obtain the proper medical care .  So - - - the next thing I did was to go to the Internet and research Psychiatrists in my area .  In full disclosure, I really did not think I would find anything that would be helpful .  But, as I persisted I came upon a name of a Psychiatrist with fifteen years experience and her private office in on Main Street of the little town that I live .  I could hardly believe it ! ! !  Additionally,  I could walk to her office - it is that close .  OK, that sounded promising !  More on this to come - - - .

When the scheduling office called about the cancellation of the appointment with the NP, they said that there was a new MD on staff that was taking new patients .  It just so happened that I very recently noticed that information in the local newspaper .  Furthermore, many years ago I had been a patient of his when he worked at the same hospital .  My experience as a patient at that time was unremarkable with no recollection of dissatisfaction . His schedule had a new patient opening in a few days and I was scheduled !  I was so happy to feel great satisfaction and optimism.

In preparation for my appointment I went through some of my medical records of the most recent and pertinent diagnostic results and I made copies for the doctor . Without going into lengthy detail I will say that I felt prepared to demand appropriate medical care !  For some reason, the old saying of  "Loaded For Bear" came to my mind!  In case you are younger than me 👵 the informal saying dates back to mid 1800's meaning "fully prepared and eager to initiate or deal with a fight, confrontation or trouble".

When I arrived at my appointment everything moved along very smoothly and to my surprise the doctor was very cordial, interactive and spent more than an hour addressing all the issues that I had . Additionally, he did a complete systems review that would in the "good ol' days" be considered an annual exam .  I even was able to finally get my tetanus vaccine shot that I have been asking for and never getting .  It is important especially since I work in my garden a lot .

I am scheduled for the CAT Scan of my abdomen for July 1 and he will do comparison studies with the previous Gastroenterology reports . He has requested the Pathology report from 2012 when two polyps were removed during a routine colonoscopy even though I was verbally told the report was normal .

A referral to the local Psychiatrist for my medication review is being made .  He is familiar and pleased with the Psychiatrist that I told him about !

CAN YOU BELIEVE IT ?  It looks like I finally have a competent Physician and his speciality is Internal Medicine . And, that is all the better .  I AM SO THANKFUL !

The garden is flourishing like I have never seen the likes of .   All the rains and some soil conditioner have certainly influenced the lovely visuals I enjoy each day .

Do you see what I see ?  I had forgotten all about the White Amaryllis .  The blooms are huge !!

 Such a stunning Rose .

And, some cheerful Nastertions and Carnations starting to bloom along the driveway .

Next time I will have more photos of the garden with all the latest plants that have started to bloom .

Happy Summer Solstice tomorrow .

Mary

Do You Like Brussels Sprouts

Does anyone know a fast way to prepare Brussels Sprouts?  It always takes me a long time to clean and trim them.

These Brussels Sprouts With White Beans and Pecorino Cheese are very good.

 I used Romano Cheese and it worked well and was good and creamy.

Sauteed mushrooms could easily be added for another layer of flavor. And, some Crispy Bacon Bits could be added for a little garnish.  And, who doesn't like a tad bit of bacon?

Have you tried any new recipes lately? If you are interested in this recipe, just leave me a note in comments.

It's nice to be back in the kitchen.  I also made some Hearty Chicken Chili  made with smokey fire-roasted tomatoes, black beans and spicy tomatoes and green chilies.  Tomorrow,  or in a day or so, I will tell you about it.

Just, a little FYI.  I am feeling GOOD physically and mentally.  Not great, but I'll take GOOD any day.  I feel very optimistic about the future.  I hope any of you dealing with tough challenges receive some relief and the rough edges are softened.

Mary